Thursday, February 4, 2010

Top 5 Reasons Why Politics and Werewolves Don't Mix

Because everyone needs a top five list like this, here goes.

1.) Fundraising is chronically mundane. Hunger, long nights and a lot of whining are a recipe to summon a full moon and some ketchup.

2.) Earmarks give us pause. Sure you can add riders, or pork, both of which sound appetizing, but we prefer our bills like our women...hairy every 28 days but still able to go wind surfing in a thong.

3.) Politicians are like adult Bratz dolls. Sure, we get blamed for scaring children and livestock but the permanent botox smiles and coiffed hair of most politicians should be interchangeable. Strom Thurmon looks remarkably similar to Nancy Pelosi and both appear to smell of too much Aqua Velva.

4.) Our foreign policy experience relies on brisket. Why don't more foreign dignitaries like brisket? Hmmm, brisket. The crockpot is a highly underrated cooking utensil.

5.) Change we can believe in typically involves ripped clothes, drool and the need for rawhide chews -- typically once a month. I smell Crown Royal...gotta run.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Who's a Couth Werewolf?

AhhhhWooooooooo!

Often misrepresented by Hollywood, werewolves are not just saliva-chic monsters. Sure, we can look that way when we're starving, but who doesn't?

Werewolf karaoke never gets news coverage. And Susan Boyle turned down a pilot tv show we were planning because she thought it would negatively reflect on her singing. We're not the Jingle Bell dogs, Susan.

But, I digress. As you know, sometimes we can get worked up. I smell prime rib.

This blog is dedicated to promoting the other side of werewolf culture. The day-at-the-beach side. The supermarket-coupon-dilemma side. The lack of proper hair-care-products side. I think you'll find our diverse and ranging perspective a refreshing twist.

Everyone needs a cultured werewolf perspective and now you have it!! AhhhhhWooooooo!!